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Despite How Open, Peaceful, and Loving You Attempt to Be, People Can Only Meet You, as Deeply as They've Met Themselves - Matt Kahn

Despite How Open, Peaceful, and Loving You Attempt to Be, People Can Only Meet You, as Deeply as They’ve Met Themselves – Matt Kahn

Expectations. When those expectations go unmet – disappointment. We allow our hearts to break and curse the guilty party for disregarding the expectations we have set out for them. Our ego cannot understand why we were disregarded and our anticipations were ignored. Our hearts were guided into unguarded territory and the unmet expectation bruised it up.

So why do we guide our hearts into unguarded territory? Why create these expectations of people and expect them to meet whatever we have set out for them? Why assume we are deserving of that kind of reverence? Is it because we treat others the way we would like to be treated? Or maybe because we assume we meet everyone else’s expectations? Or maybe our egos are just that BIG?

The hard truth – we cannot control what another person is, how they will treat us, what expectation they will meet, or how they prioritize the relationship they have with us. We can want anyone to be what we would like them to be, but we cannot force them to be whatever we want him or her to be. People are who they are at whatever point they are in their lives, they have their own journeys, their own hang-ups, their own insecurities, their own dreams, their own desires, their own path, and their own expectations.

The realization – we control what we do, how we treat others, what we expect, how we prioritize relationships, and how we choose to perceive people. We can allow frustration to consume our heart or we can understand the other may not see the world as we do; and however they see the world, we would hope, they show us the same understanding if we have not met THEIR expectations.

Despite How Open, Peaceful, and Loving You Attempt to Be, People Can Only Meet You, as Deeply as They’ve Met Themselves – Matt Kahn
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About Lily Daub

Lily Daub - I am a freelance writer and dedicate myself to being a student of life. I am passionate about learning, sharing, and being witness to other's learning and sharing. I believe in the collective spirit and improving this world through compassion and love. Besides contributing to The Seeds 4 Life, I also write on my personal page 10lewrites.wordpress.com

3 comments

  1. So true!! I am finding myself struggling with expectations vs reality so much lately, this was such a nice read!
    Thank you!!

  2. True, we cannot expect others to treat us well if we treat them nicely. The reverse is also true. But there are a very few people who treat us well even if we behave like an ass. In Hindu philosophy it is said do your work without expecting fruit of your action. This probably means we can give our best but we cannot control the outcome.

  3. May be the answer is not to expect, but to as the saying goes “go with the flow”. Is there really any other way? Enjoy the ride as much as you can. Sometimes it’s bumpy, some times its full of excitement. Whatever, it’s better then nothing. When you truly know yourself and your qualities, it becomes so much easier to accept the good and the bad. It teaches you, you grow, isn’t that the point of loving and living?

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