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Remember, When You Point a Finger at Someone, There Are Three More Pointing Back at You – Unknown

Remember, When You Point a Finger at Someone, There Are Three More Pointing Back at You – Unknown

How easy it is for us to point at each other and criticize one another’s shortcomings, flaws, and wrong doings? How easy it is for us to point at each other and blame one another for our hurts and disappointments?

While we are blaming and criticizing others, we are forgetting one important fact: when we point the finger at someone, three of them are pointed right back at us.  They point back at us to remind us that regardless of who or what we may feel is responsible for our current state and situation, ultimately, the responsibility is ours. We have three times more control than the one we point our finger to. We also have three times more responsibility than the one we point our finger to.

They also point back at us to remind us, the imperfections we point out in others are also in us. When we are pointing at another’s shortcoming’s and flaws, we are only defining ourselves as intolerant and judgmental. Those three fingers pointed back at us reminds us to self-reflect and recognize, and accept our imperfections and shortcomings instead of pointing them out in another.

When we point our finger at the world, we give up control of where and what we are. This shifts responsibilities for our actions and reactions to others, when in fact, it is ours. We are responsible for our actions, as well as our consequences.  We can either be slaves to the belief the world is to blame or we can recognize we are powerful beings in this world, capable of creating love and positive change.

As Mahatma Gandhi once encouraged, “BE THE CHANGE.” This does not begin by pointing the finger, it begins by paying attention to the three pointed back at ourselves.

flickr photo shared by quinn.anya under a Creative Commons ( BY-SA ) license

Remember, When You Point a Finger at Someone, There Are Three More Pointing Back at You – Unknown
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About Lily Daub

Lily Daub - I am a freelance writer and dedicate myself to being a student of life. I am passionate about learning, sharing, and being witness to other's learning and sharing. I believe in the collective spirit and improving this world through compassion and love. Besides contributing to The Seeds 4 Life, I also write on my personal page 10lewrites.wordpress.com


  1. Very good seed, Lily! It is so true that we all need to realize that we are the ones that are responsible for our lives. I think we are all guilty of, at times, blaming others for our shortcomings.

  2. This is why when I point I use my whole hand with all fingers extended. Less complicated.

  3. Excellent advice. What goes out comes back ten fold, right?

    Have a great weekend. Hugs Paula xxx

  4. This concept of three fingers pointing back – I heard it spoken by Julia Butterfly Hill. Her experience of tree sitting brought the revelation. The origins are not unknown- google search brings this up. thanks for the prompt to look again at her powerful message. I just think it is important – in being the change – to credit if one can the brave journeys that brought on the revelation. http://www.may41970.com/May%204,%202000/30th%20Commemoration%20Report/Speeches/JuliaHill.htm

    • This is a guest post Misa, but I always do research to make sure a quote gets attributed to the correct person. Every time I’ve seen this quote, it’s attributed to Unknown, Anonymous, or blank. Mrs. Hill might talk about a similar concept as the quote, but I’ve never seen it anywhere attributed to her, thanks for pointing it out though.

  5. I really like this, thank you! Especially about taking responsibility

  6. I am only just seeing this post, but I love the reminder of the three fingers pointing back at us! That image will remain in my mind whenever I want to criticize or blame. I once read that the traits we dislike in other people are usually the same ones we recognize and dislike in ourselves. I don’t know if that’s true all of the time, but I’m sure it’s true some of the time. Thanks for an insightful post!

  7. Three Fingers pointing back at us to remind us that we are no better,that no one is perfect. A nd so we must continually reflect that which we like to see in others. Great post!

  8. Great post: Remember, When You Point a Finger at Someone, There Are Three More Pointing Back at You – GANDHI it is a quote of gandhi’s one of my fav, but I forgot to add it to my favs.

    love your post, realise this an old post, but lovely all the samed

  9. So true!

  10. Always good to remember.. I think I first heard that as a child… about 50 years ago… in church. It’s an old saying.. It goes Way back… beyond Ghandi even… though he re-quoted it, and since he became so famous… it has been attributed to him most, lately.

  11. So true. Learned this from my dad along time ago. Thanks for this excellent post.

  12. i used to point endlessly but now i think before pointing, nice read

  13. It’s easier to change yourself than another. Enjoyed your writing. Thanks for the reminder (it is the parable of he who throws the first stone).

  14. Thanks for following my blog. I’ve been lagging on the writing lately, so I haven’t kept up reading either. I have a lot to catch up on. Really enjoyed this piece.

  15. Brent Harvey ('The Leading Man

    Great article, it is easy to forget that what we see in the world is just a reflection of how we feel and see ourselves.

  16. And then there are those who voted for Trump… I feel like we can all point at them for free.

  17. Thank you for these words of wisdom. It’s important for people to wake up to the fact that there is no such thing as a victim. We all co-create our own reality. Let’s look inside…

  18. Brugh Joy. Interesting blog…

  19. thanks for the follow, and the advice!

  20. I only recently stopped pointing. I love this! Thank you!

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